Philippians 4:8 says “whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.”This passage is often used as a “feel good” passage about positive thinking as those speaking of it encourage us to think happy thoughts and loving thoughts and gentle thoughts. But have you ever considered what each of those words really mean? Let’s look at them together.

Sometimes people need to hear that their spouse is not the enemy in order to reorient them to cooperation instead of conflict - particularly when what you truly have are two with the capacity for relational health who simply don’t have the skills to achieve peace but can learn them. But sometimes that’s not what you have. Sometimes you have a spouse who can’t (or won’t) work together with you no matter how hard people-helpers get them to try. What do you do then?